Retirement: I Give You Permission To Do Nothing

Transition is tough. So, it's predictable that those retired would come for a tarot session to "get permission" to, well, relax. For decades they had been socialized to be productive. That entails staying busy.

Well, the good news on that one is this: It might take a while but eventually the retired can slide into the extreme pleasure of doing nothing.

In The Wall Street Journal Robbie Shell celebrates that he reached that milestone. But not easily. He notes that for several years:

"I was following one of the most important commandments of retirement: Keep busy to stave off feelings of isolation or depression."

Then came that ah-ha moment of doing nothing while at a cabin and enjoying it. 

While the weather still hadn't become wintery and the leaves on the trees were beginning to exude amazing color I hosted a dry run on doing nothing for three tarot-reading clients. I drove them to Geneva on the Lake, about an hour from Erie, Pennsylvania and an hour from Youngstown, Ohio.

I ruled out a side trip to Frank's Fram Market in Fairview, PA. Selecting and stocking up on vegetables might be experienced as defaulting into being productive.

Once on the beach, which was primarily deserted, we reflected on how to do nothing. Soon enough these human beings struggling to release themselves from the bondage of being busy got it: Doing nothing simply meant opening to pleasure. And pleasure comes in an infinite number of forms. 

One discovered the beauty of the contours of the rocks on the beach near the water. Collecting them was okay, that is still doing nothing, because it had no relationship to a former career or making money.

Another recorded the sounds of the waves crashing. 

The third took the long walk to where the rocks were and carefully climbed on them.

We ate at McDonald's. There we could eat and then sit doing nothing since that fast-food refuge allows lingering. If you ask for it there's a senior discount of 75-cents for a small coffee. We audited any residual guilt about doing nothing. We also realized that doing nothing could cost almost nothing or nothing. The state park in Geneva, OH had no entrance fee. Also no fee for parking. Rock collecting had no fee. Recording the waves crashing had no fee. Talking and listening had no fee.

Of course, there was the natural conclusion that there are times when you have to do something. Often a cluster of somethings. The coming holidays mandated plenty of that clustering. But there are ways of approaching that which let in joy. Not the crushing burden of responsibility. 

That's where the Chariot card in the tarot came in. Let go of the tight grip on the reins.

Just go with it. The price for a Lego packet for a grandchild went up from last year. So? Stuff a little less into the envelope. What could have been angst could be transformed into a "nothing big" in a life.

Of course, whatever our profession we learn most from our clients. What I learned from our collective journey was that doing nothing is an attitude. At any time I could rope off the afternoon and make it a do-nothing. In Eastern religion that's called the "sacred pause."

Thriving in confusing times starts from the inside.

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