Solo Aging: Luxury for Many

 Memories of dealing with roommates, for financial reasons. Bunking with a spouse or lover as the relationship yielded diminishing returns. Those offspring hanging on at home. Bearing witness to friends who are stuck co-living. And, oh, that first 18 years of life with family before fleeing to college where even dorm life wasn't as bad.

Having to no longer put up with any of that has been a blessing for a growing number of my over-50 clients. Their deep satisfaction is symbolized in the tarot deck by The World Card. 

To achieve it usually they have made sacrifices. 

Common was pulling up roots in a High Cost of Living (HCOL) area to a Low Cost of Living (LCOL) in order to afford their own habitat. Another was continuing to work to pay the differential single people have to live with. A third was investing the energy into reaching out to build social support systems. 

However, such a content state of being isn't universal. In Debbie-Downer manner, The Wall Street Journal positions it as:

"Solo agers must navigate complex financial, medical decisions without a built-in safety net"

Moreover, too many of the 750 comments to the article reinforce aging alone as living out a life in hell. And a condition that results from "mistakes." One responder puts it this way:

"I wonder how many of today's young women who have been seduced by the popular 'toxic male' outlook will end up embittered and alone. Life's great until you hit 50 or 60 then you think 'Oops, big mistake.'"

Of course, there are the complexities which the WSJ cites. But those also exist big time for people who don't live alone. Married clients who live under one roof continually balk about the angst if there will be a stock market crash, having to travel out of town to the Mayo or Cleveland Clinics for medical procedures and shoring up failure-to-launch offspring.

The elephant in the room is this: aging per se. A college friend's take on it has been: It goes on and it goes on. Under one roof she is doing caretaking for a husband with memory issues. The memory facility they tried, at $8,000 a month, seemed to worsen things. Meanwhile, maybe it's the stress. She has developed heart problems.

There are no precedents for our longevity. Each round of several birthdays introduces fresh challenges. Both those living together and those of us living alone fear running out of enough money to pay the monthly bills. New health problems could pop up. Close friends die and it's not that easy to make new ones, even for couples. More and more come to me for a tarot reading to gain insight about marriage which lacks companionship.

The new kind of hero in our society might organize a 12-step program Aging Anonymous. That could generate the same kind of unexpected miracle solution that Dr. Bob and Bill W. conjured up for alcoholism in the 1930s. Just like the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous we aging could pool together our experience, strength and hope to navigate aging. No one would be alone, not anymore.

Path to earning a good living, finding your tribe and not going insane is doable.

Let’s start the journey together with a Tarot reading.

One free question.

Jane Genova, 3rd Generation Psychic 203-468-8579, jangenova374@gmail.com



 

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